Should I Move Back in with My Parents

You might have high student loans or lost your job. You’re not alone. Millennials are flocking home. Should you consider moving in with your parents? It’s becoming the norm.

You should move back in with your parents. This is an opportunity to save money on rent and other expenses. If you need childcare, your parents are a great resource. Your parents will also benefit from the help you’ll provide.

Young adults are moving back home with their parents for numerous reasons. But is this the right choice? We’ll look at the reasons millennials should move back in with mom and dad.

Reasons to Move in With Your Parents

There are numerous reasons why moving in with your parents makes sense. Evaluate these reasons. Don’t let emotions interfere with making a decision that just makes sense for your wellbeing and future.

You Can’t Afford to Live on Your Own

You lost your job; now what. The bills keep coming in, and rent needs to be paid. You’re not alone; between the 2009 recession and COVID, many young adults—millennials—lost their jobs. Restaurants closed, leaving servers and chefs out of work. Corporate America took its hit too.

In fact, millennials took it on the chin with COVID. In the first part of the pandemic, 22 million Americans lost their jobs. Considering that millennials made up 22 percent of the population in 2019, they were obviously severely impacted.

Young adults were already struggling before the pandemic compared to other generations. Baby boomers made up 31 percent of the U.S. population in the 90s and made up 21 percent of the national wealth,  according to the Washington Post. Compare that to today’s millennials who are in the same age bracket as boomers were in the 90s but only own 3.2 percent of U.S. wealth. That’s dismal.

But how does that affect you? It’s harder to make a living that allows the same lifestyle that your parents had. It’s difficult just to pay for the basics. And you add in an economic crisis, and that makes the choice either poverty or living with your parents.

Adults who had lived on their own for years found themselves calling mom and dad. It meant having a frank discussion with parents. It’s a temporary setback, and you just need to be with them for a while. You’re not living off of them; you’ll pay your way when you can. You just need a little assistance.

Living at Your Parents’ Home a Safer Option

It’s a big bad scary world. There are dangers that your parents and grandparents never had to contend with.  And let’s face it, it’s a lot safer to move in with mom and dad instead of advertising for a roommate on Craigslist. You don’t have to worry about getting your stuff stolen or deal with some psycho. Well, maybe you’ll have to deal with your psycho parents once in a while.

Forty-four percent of young adults are afraid of being a victim of a crime. That’s more than any other generation. The factors involved in this fear include:

  • Illegal drugs
  • Mental illness
  • Gangs

Indeed, many young adults feel unsafe walking in their neighborhoods.

In pioneer days, they circled the wagons when there was an imminent attack. Circling the wagons now encompasses families banding together under one roof for safety. Moving in with your parents not only helps you, but offers security to your parents.

Educational Goals Can be Achieved

To move down a career path, you need more education. You could be working on that undergraduate degree. Or you might be taking it a step further and going for a graduate degree. Regardless, it’s hard enough to pool your money and loans together for the tuition, let alone the room and board.

If you have the opportunity to live with mom and dad, look at this as a vehicle. You can still work part time, but ultimately, you’ll have more time and less stress. It allows you to concentrate on meeting your educational goal.

You’re Going Through a Transitional Period

You’re going through a transition period. Some reasons could be:

  • Job Loss
  • Graduation
  • Divorce
  • Death

Any one of these factors can stop you short in life. And it’s likely, you’re not sure what to do next. You don’t need to go all transcendental and go on a search to find yourself. You just need time to make a plan. Sometimes the answer is taking the time to heal if it’s been a life changing episode.

Often, going back to your parents’ house is seeking refuge. You’re not hiding from life; you’re recovering from life. Every change has a loss with it. Even graduating from school is a loss. You’ve lost your childhood, and it’s time to start the transition of growing up and taking on adulthood. It’s entirely possible to do this by returning to your old home.

Your Parents Need Your Help

It’s not all about you. Often a parent needs help. This could be:

  • Emotional
  • Physical
  • Financial

A parent may have just gone through a life changing event. A spouse may have passed, or they may have retired. Often a touch with death, via a heart attack, can be life changing. Your parent may have a strong emotional need to have you with them.

A heart attack or stroke can create a physical reason to need help. Although home healthcare is available, supplementing that with a loving child goes a long way. An aging parent may need help with cooking or laundry. Even something as basic as mowing the grass can be a burden your parent can’t handle.

A parent could also be having a financial crisis. Maintaining a house is expensive. And those who didn’t plan for retirement and are only living on social security could be hurting. By moving into the family home and helping with expenses, you could take a lot of pressure off your parents.

This doesn’t mean you put your life on hold. It means you incorporate their lives into yours. This is an opportunity to know your parents on a deeper level. Instead of looking through the eyes of a child, you’ll be seeing your parents—adult, to adult.

Not Ready to Be on Your Own

Children grow physically at different rates. Even siblings have growth spurts at different times. Emotional growth acts in the same way. Not every 25-year-old is ready to be out on their own. You may not be ready.

That doesn’t mean anything. You just need more time.

Some young adults move back with their parents because they don’t want to be alone. Roommates are great, but they have their drawbacks. It’s no big deal if you like to have someone else in the house with you. That’ll probably pass as you become more confident and independent.

As you grow stronger emotionally, you’ll reach a point that you feel ready to move out. But don’t go until you feel ready. Mom and dad will understand.

Moving Back with Parents: Often A Good Move

Are you still not sure and don’t want to be seen as a failure? You’ve been watching too much T.V. Often, T.V. sitcoms and movies will portray moving back in with parents in a negative and comical light. Do you remember “Failure to Launch” or even going way back, do you remember “All in the Family”?

You’re called a “boomerang kid.” It’s a label, and labels rarely tell the whole story. Consequently, there’s an undeserved prejudice when it comes to moving into your parents’ home.

This isn’t a failure it’s an adaption to what’s going on with:

  • The economy
  • Divorce
  • Single parenthood
  • Society as a whole

The definition of intelligence is the ability to adapt. By moving back in with your parents, you show the ability to face, not hide from life. You adapt. You’re accepting your circumstances and giving yourself time to come up with a plan to deal with them.

Many Countries Embrace Living with Parents

In other areas around the world, such as Asia, adult children living with their parents is common. Many multi-generations live under one roof. Yes, to a certain extent, it’s a cultural thing, but it isn’t wrong or bad. And it’s not exclusive to Asia.

In the U.K., 44 percent of adult children live with their parents. That’s compared to 52 percent of young adults who live with their parents in the U.S. It’s pretty much the norm in both countries.

Adult Children Moving Home is More than a Trend

Even before the pandemic young adults were living with mom and dad. According to the Census Bureau, in 2019, 17 percent of adults 25-34 lived in a multigenerational household. That number has increased by over 30 percent very quickly.

Make Moving in with Your Parents a Positive

It’s ok to move back in with your parents. It’s not a forever proposition. You’ll move out eventually and be stronger for the experience. In the end, you’ll find that you’re not only financially able to face the world, but you are in a better emotional place.

Anne Johnson

Anne is both a writer and a Nana. She attended University of Akron and went on to have a career in television sales. She now writes and promotes the multigenerational lifestyle. Currently she resides in South Carolina with her husband, two cats, a horse and fabulous grands.

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